Saturday, August 09, 2008

How to Fish

On our way back from Amirah's Grill (which by the way, serves really decent middle eastern cuisine in an intimately cozy space with very hip-swaying music) where C got his kebab craving fixed, there was a healthy brainstorm in the car on methods to catch the 2 elusive arowanas that his client was going to give him. C's original plan was to buy a big fishing net, jump into the pond and net the fish - because apparently, "arowanas swim damn fast". O...k....but how about these suggestions:

- freeze the pond and carve out the cubed fish. Defrost soon after.
- drain half the pond so fish have limited space to swim. Easy to grab.
- heat up the pond it's so hot, fish would jump out. Then grab them.
- dissolve 100 paracetemol tablets into the pond, tranq the fish and nab them.
- partition the pond, herd them to one small space and jump in!

Now, once the fish is caught, my question to C was, how is he planning to transport the fish to his place. The look on his face says, I.havent.thought.that.far.ahead.yet.

Will the bank still accept payment in lieu if fish are dead? hmm.

1 comment:

Fish fingers? cow fingers? said...

Well, the answer on how to transport them home becomes obvious....(depending on catch method)
1.Freezing- just take cubed fish and rush home in back of car, hopefully getting home before they defrost..
2. Drain pond... er.. wrap fish in smelly old socks to maintain moisture (i saw them do this to whale on Nat geo)
3. Heat pond... er.. by the time fish jump out, me thinks they already basically..put them between 2 huge buns and have a nice sandwitch.
4. Paracetemol - Fish drugged, they dun care.. they cold be sooo stoned that they ridgid.. so just throw in boot.
5. Partition pond etc.. well...Thats the last way i would use, cuz its BORING and not a challenge.. i suppose 1 - 4 wold have taken care of them sufficiently!!

By the way, if t here is a bUll market and a bear market.. how does a fish market go???? Swimingly good?... stinkingly awful?