The TV is mightier than the Keyboard

Q: Why has Downward Dog's blog been neglected for several weeks?
A: Wuxia drama addict rise again.

Anyone who is a fan of Jin Yong will know this guy writes the best wuxia novels. Most of them got made into tv dramas anyway. Now, I got caught up with the latest china remake of Bixue Jian. Relatively unknown cast butbutbutbutbutbut the fighting sequences are really damn good. One of the best I've seen in a long time. Finally could not resist so had to rent the entire series from the store so I could finish it ahead of slow-poke SCV ch55. :P

Oh it's that good. I hardly went yoga, I finished work promptly as much as I could, so I could sit my big arse at the sofa for 3-4hrs nighty till 1am, happy as a lark. Took me all of 4 days to finish 20 eps. Pretty good record.

Of course, now that Jin Yong drama fever is back, I got myself the entire rental set of Flying Fox from the store too. But aiyah, sequence, hero and cast is not as compelling as BXJ. Yawn.

The Great Eruption

An eruption of epic proportions today. Mt Vesuvius @ Kim Keat ave style. Massive spreads of grossly stinky, wet, odiferous, stench gaggging blobs of 'molten lava' in piles everywhere from the balconey to the living room to the kitchen to to the dining area. Nowhere to run and nowhere to hide. That was the scene that greeted me as I stepped out of my room at 7am this morning. 2 sheepish looking iggys looking up at me with big blinking yet guilty eyes.

I had to spend 30 back breaking perspiring minutes cleaning up every glob, wet and dry. Copious amounts of dettol and bleach were used. Rose candle was exercised in full force to counteract stench poison. Euuuw. Major euuuw. My gf says changing diapers for her precocious Lenny is nasty business and she tries to avoid it. Well when one has dogs, cleaning diapers for babies is like a walk in the park. Dog owners in the shit cleaning business for at least 10 years. Lenny had better start potty training now if she doesn't want to change diapers anymore.

Went looking for the butter pound cake Veron had baked for me after the vesuvius messs was contained. Only to find the brown paper bag on the floor, a whole in the corner, and the alumnium pound cake tray that once held a butter pound cake now poundcake-less. The plastic lid was off. It took no genius to put two and two together to realise one or both of the vesuvius perps actually got onto the dining table some how, dragged the paper bag to the floor and ate everything. Which is why vesuvius erupted. ARRRRGHHH. Con says it's their Happy Mother's Day present to me. Man, if one could see the look on my face.

Poundcake-less Tiffany-less Moo.

Lost

Lost my square Tiffany ring. Not even sure how and when. It was there and then it wasn't there. Man, what a heartache. $400+ down the sink (had a sinking feeling it slipped off my fingers after I washed my hands). Arrrghhh. It's a beautiful piece, but to replace it...gawd, means I'd have to sacrifice some Tod's shopping budget or a vacation budget. Arrgh. Decisions decisions.

Heavy Burden

Extra 5kg is no lightweight matter. As I soon realised in yoga, an extra 5kg makes handstands, push ups, upward dogs, and even jumping through is so much harder when the butt is one heavy pendulum swinging things around and throwing me off balance. Skinny arms didn't grow weight proportion to how the butt and tummy grew, so ouch, man, that 5kg sure feels heavy. Not to mention when one's yoga teacher is making adjustments to one's posture, she had to slide her hands to my belly to remind me to tuck my tummy in. Errrp, how embarressing. Super malu. Aiyah.

Speaking of 5kg, the Bis is reallly looking like an old man with a bald spot and a paunch. And his heavy burden means he aint' no light fleetfooted IG no more. And it shows. He can't even catch up with Holly when chasing her, and gets winded after a 5 sec chase. Alamak. Even Con says Bis is looking like a sorry miserable old hound. He chipped another of his tooth again, and one other tooth had started to decay. Bad mommy, cuz she hasn't been brushing his teeth. I have to admit, there was a heck lot of grime accumulated at the underside of his teeth when I finallly took the toothbrush to him. Even the toothpaste had expired from lack of use. Aww man.

Bad Mommy OM.

Revelations

Revelations.

1. Stumpy looking shorty balding old men who look like janitors are actually doctors in disguise at Mt E clinics.

2. When handed 2 plastic containers + 1 inconspicuous white plastic bag, and pointed to the restroom. It's the universally understood command for producing "samples" on demand. Errr.....

3. Learning yoga helped 'grow' me 0.7cm taller as I learnt to straighten my spine when they measure my height.

4. Learning yoga does not mean one does not put on weight. One has reached the remarkable line on the scale numbering 49.9kg.

5. Yoga does not reduce body fat.

6. Yoga also does not prevent waistline from reaching a remarkable 74cm. Momentarily stupefied was the expression when first informed.

7. Guess learning yoga does not stop one from pigging out like a errr...pig, cow, sheep.

8. Upmarket boutique at Paragon having closing down sale. 90% discounts. Designer clothing at rock bottom prices. Cheap cheap cheap. Except my bottom ain't exactly hard like a rock. It's more like 'flabby-gasted' as I huffed and puffed and blithely had to admit size 29 pants is a tight fit. You knows those filipino aunties in tight fitting tops and crop shorts you see flitting around Lucky Plaza with their fleshy parts sticking out? Yes green Roccobarroco pants are pretty, but when one's pale quivering (frosty like chicken) flabby-gasted thighs and arse fill the hot pants to the brim and arse spilleth over..... Time to reconsider. (moments pause). Well for a $30 price tag, not much to consider. Pants now safely in cupboard.

Cows in midlife crisis.

Yes as I looked around in yoga class today, and see people I havent seen in awhile, looking fitter and leaner and stronger before, I feel like a real auntie now.

Cow in hot pants arse-spilleth over moo.

Strange encounters

Strange encounter #1: Walked dogs in the morning and met 'jogging uncle' who exclaimed, "wah! miss, haven't seen you in a few days, you face puffier and rounder leh!". My reply, "err, uncle. Maybe it's the hair lor, permed leow more pong pong, make face look rounder". Although I really fervently hoped my perm of an excuse was true. But yes, face is rounder indeed. Hardly can see my pointy chin nowadays.

Strange encounter #2: Con had a Beemer 7 series on loan for the weekend, thanks to his moron of a brother who somehow had a cool job as an editor of a gadget magazine. Anyway, driving this monster is scary. It's smooth, silent, and heavy, but as I slowly meandered my way around traffic on saturday morning. I cross all fingers, toes and limbs that I wouldn't put scratch, dent or injury to this car. Beemer is actually pretty cool, beautiful inside, with seats of supreme comfort, hi tech gadgets that has a button for everything, secret compartments and fancy smancy stuff. My childhood ambition was that the first car I owned would be a Beemer, I haven't achieved it yet, but driving one sure is scary. And expensive. Well, if I had $300K to spare, then I guess $4k in road tax and $25 per 100km in petrol is peanut shit. Maybe I'll stick to energy friendly solar powered hybrid cars instead. But we had a fun date with Beemer, parked at mt faber and reclining in the back seats munching on chips and soda, watching dvd on the in-car entertainment system. Best part of the evening was how cars next to us kept moving in and out of their parking lots, as couples came and went. Obviously that carpark is a happening spot for necking couples. It would have been so much fun had C let me walk over to them, knock on their windows and yell, "Make sure you use a goddamn condom!". Fwahahahhaha.

Actually, maybe it's a good idea to setup a small pushcart at that parking lot hawking drinks and condoms. I mean, surely sometimes emergency supplies are needed, right? Fwahahhaha. Muahahhaha.

Price of Innovation

Creativity, innovation doesn't come cheap. Take this for example:

Cost of haircut + perm = $270.
Cost of hair colouring + treatment = $250
Cost of new clothes to match new hairdo = twice total expenditure on hair
Cost of business books on strategy etc etc = $120 (even after borders coupon)

No, innovation is not cheap. Could have gotten a pair of new tods shoes. But then, I have so many shoes the cupboard is overflowing. Bis and Holly has taken to chewing the rubber off those that are left outside the cupboard. Aiieeee.

Do all the above give me a competitive advantage, or make me win like a leader? Don't think so. Think I'll just sigh deeply when I get my credit card bills later. Gulp.

Today, I have a big tina turner hairdo. It's volumnous, hairsprayed to the death. Sure it elicited many stares on orchard road. Con says it looks as if I got a hedgehog on my head. Actually I kinda look like Medusa now. Con and slick agrees. It's just strange feeling not to be able to comb my hair. Feels wierd.

Cows turned sheep Moo.